Government is a Waste of Taxpayer Money
I have been the director of the parks and recreation department of Pawnee, Indiana
for over six years. I am a proud libertarian and eschew all functions of government. Despite working
as the director, I do not want this parks department to build any parks because I believe all government is
a waste of taxpayer money. My idea of an ideal government is one guy who sits in a small room at a desk,
and the only thing he's allowed to decide is who to nuke. I believe the park system should be privatized
and run entirely by corporations for profit, as exemplified by the business model of the Chuck E. Cheeses
chain of family entertainment centers.
I advocate for program cuts wherever possible, and purposely try to hire people who are bad
at their jobs so they will slow the government down. I exert almost no energy into my job, and let my deputy
director Leslie Knope do the vast majority of the work at the parks department. I also like saying no to lower
my colleagues enthusiasm.